Have a Little Faith

Chicken Soup for the Soul: A Book of Miracles

BY: Emily Weaver

So then, don't be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.
~Genesis 50:21

I don't think my husband and I really understood what we had gotten ourselves into. Sure we knew things would be tough. We were both still in college, newly married, and our first baby had just been born. Life was chaotic, money was short, but we had more than enough love to get us through. What more did we need?

Life soon taught us that love doesn't put food on the table, nor does love magically make baby formula appear.

This reality was all too real as I looked helplessly at the neatly lined-up canisters of baby formula on the drugstore shelf. There were dozens of varieties. Name brand, off-brand, specialty, soy- and lactose-free. The one thing they had in common, however, was that they were all out of my price range.

I opened my purse for the hundredth time that morning and wanted to cry. I had $2.23. Not enough for a can of formula.

My sweet baby boy was sleeping in the shopping cart and at that moment panic set in. What would happen when he was hungry and I had nothing to give him? Sure I could ask my mom for help or my mother-in-law, but considering they were miles away, it wouldn't help me today. An unexpected car repair had taken every extra dime we'd had that month. And now my baby was going to go hungry.

I bought four packages of ramen noodles instead, and silently wondered if they were on the list of "okay foods for a three-month-old infant."

My husband was waiting for us in the car and after securing the baby I plopped into the passenger seat.

"What are we doing?" I choked back a sob. "We are barely making rent, barely getting studying done, and now we can't buy formula for our baby! We don't even deserve him."

My husband took my hand and kissed it, with tears of his own forming.

"Have a little faith, Em," he told me. "We knew it was going to be hard. I'll think of something. I won't let our baby starve, and neither will God."
At that moment something in me just snapped. My husband always had to throw the "faith" card into everything. I had never been one to pin my hopes on such an abstract idea and at that moment it seemed almost comically frustrating to me.

"Faith?" I asked in a snide tone. "You think faith is going to, right this minute, feed our newborn? Do you think faith is going to magically fill our fridge? If God really wanted to help us He would have never given us a beautiful baby and then allowed him to go hungry. Faith hasn't helped us much up to this point, Ryan. Why should it suddenly help us now?"

Ryan was quiet. He didn't chastise me, or lecture me, or even say anything to make me feel his disapproval. He just kissed my hand again and started the car.

"Well, I still have faith," was all he said.

The ride home was silent. I was worried about the night ahead. I had enough formula for one bottle, maybe two if I mixed it thin. In the morning I would call my mom, swallow my pride, and ask her to transfer money into my checking account. If only I could have bought one can of formula to tide us over until payday. Still, better to put away the ego and ask for help instead of letting my baby starve, I supposed.

My thoughts were interrupted as Ryan pulled into the small post office parking lot.

"Stopping for the mail," he announced. "I forgot to get it yesterday."

Our apartment complex didn't offer mail service so we had to stop at the post office every day and check our P.O. box. It was rainy and cold and I cursed this inconvenience as I hopped out of the car.

I inserted the key into our box and was surprised to find another key nestled among the pile of letters. Attached to it was a note:

"You have received a package that was too large for your post office box. Please use this key to retrieve it in box 40C."

What could the package be? We weren't expecting any sort of large delivery.

I located box 40C and turned the key. When the door opened my heart skipped a beat. I instantly recognized the symbol on the large box as the logo of the baby formula we had been using for our son. With all the excitement of a child on Christmas morning, I tore open the package to find two full-sized cans of formula inside, with a coupon for two more free cans to be redeemed at the store.

Still in shock, I ran outside to my waiting husband. I showed him the precious delivery and began to cry tears of relief. Knowing my child wouldn't go hungry that day or the rest of the week even, was the most uplifting sensation I had ever experienced.

"I don't know what to think," I told Ryan. "I can't believe that today, of all days, we would be so lucky to get free formula samples."

"Do you have faith now?" Ryan asked me with a smile.

That day was the beginning of my own relationship with God. I learned He is always by our side. He never lets us walk alone. We just have to have a little faith.

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