By Christine M. Smith
The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.
~Oprah Winfrey
One day when I was browsing a garage sale, with my three children in tow, I found a big red plate that caught my eye. It was right before Valentine's Day and the words on the plate read... "You Are Special Today!"
"Should I buy this and use it to serve Daddy a nice Valentine's Day dinner?" I asked the children.
"Yes, Daddy... dinner." They agreed. Or at least the toddler did. The other two were busy digging through the box of toys selling for ten cents.
I bought the plate for a steal... just one dollar. On Valentine's Day I prepared my husband's favorite meal, decorated the table with a tablecloth and candles and placed the pretty red plate with its special message for the special man in my life. "So, I'm special today?" he asked. "Why today?" He was teasing... he never forgot our anniversary, my birthday or Valentine's Day.
This started the tradition of "the special plate." As my family grew the red plate was used often. The birthday boy or girl always got it. If anyone had a special accomplishment at school or work... they got it. When baseball or football games were won... and sometimes when they were lost as well... the plate was brought out. It was used for celebrations but also to perk up spirits when an arm got broken or someone was ill. Visitors and special guests of honor were given use of the plate. As the children grew and invited friends over for sleepovers they would ask, "Can my friend use the special plate tonight?"
So many times... and for so many occasions the special plate was brought out over the years. Through celebrations and tragedies alike the plate made each of us feel special when it was our turn to use it.
The special plate has made it through our three children, thirteen grandchildren, and many foster children. Adults and children alike recognized it and even came to expect it. On occasion feelings have been hurt because the special plate was not offered when it should have been... an oversight for certain... never intentionally.
My husband and I are alone now. Everyone comes and visits from time to time. Still, in all the hustle and bustle of our busy lives the plate is not being used as often. On special occasions no one thinks of the plate until the meal has begun and it's too late to bring it out. I found it a little sad that this was the case at our last family gathering. It was my birthday and I missed being honored with the special plate. It had been forgotten, no longer an important part of our lives. How had this happened to something that had been so much a part of us for so long a time? After family had gone home I took out the plate and looked at it. One chip and a few scratches marred the surface but the plate was still bright red and the words still legible. I bought a plate hanger and hung the plate in a place of honor over our dining room table.
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Since giving the plate a place of honor I have enjoyed watching the reactions of family members as they notice it on the wall. Not one person has seen it without sharing one or two special memories about the plate. "I remember when I broke my arm...." my son recalled.
My older daughter shared, "You brought me home from school on my birthday and we had a special mother/daughter luncheon together. I felt so pampered and special. Because my birthday is on Valentine's Day you had the table set in red and white and I ate on the special plate."
My husband shared, "I got laid off and dreaded telling you... I felt like a loser. That night you served me on the special plate, reminding me that it was me and you against the world. Suddenly I felt ten feet tall!"
Even my best friend had a memory to share. "I said hurtful things to you. I feared our friendship was over. You invited me to lunch and served my favorite sandwich on the special plate."
My younger daughter recalled, "When I was fourteen and my best friend, Erica, died in my arms... I was having a difficult time dealing with her death. I ate on this plate for over a week."
I also enjoy telling my own stories when acquaintances and friends comment on the plate.
As I write this I cannot help but compare this plate to the cycles of life... especially my own. As a young wife and mother I was in much demand. Everyone wanted or needed me. Like the plate I shined brightly because I served a purpose. As time passed I wore many hats... wife, mother, grandmother, sister, aunt, teacher and friend. Like the plate, I may have a few chips and scratches but I am still useful and well loved after all!
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