среда, 4 января 2012 г.

I Resolved to Make Our Own Holidays

By Saralee Perel

Every day of our lives we are on the verge of making those slight changes that would make all the difference.
~Mignon McLaughlin

It is a bittersweet day when we carefully wrap our holiday ornaments to store in the attic. But years ago, as I was about to take the stockings down, I thought, "If I put these away, there won't be presents in them until next December! That doesn't make sense." So I left one stocking up, where it stays all year. And every so often there's a present in it -- for no reason whatsoever.

Sometimes my husband Bob or I will say to each other, "Have you checked the stocking?" It's never anything big -- maybe a candy bar or a crossword puzzle book.

Every Christmas, we have an elegant dinner by candlelight. This year, as I felt glowingly aware of the uniqueness of the day, time stopped for me in a moment of bliss. And I said to Bob, "Why can't more days be like this?"

"They can't," he said. "This day is special because it comes once a year."

"But that's just in our minds. Life's too short to limit celebrations to what it says on a calendar."

We were savoring Yorkshire pudding when Bob said, "If we had this more often, we wouldn't appreciate it."

"Who says? Every summer when you bite into a lusciously ripe home-grown tomato, you close your eyes in a state of nirvana. Would you want one tomato a year?"

"No," he laughed. "But holidays are different."

"I think you're wrong. It's all what we tell ourselves. I don't want to wait until next December to feel holiday joy."

"But that's when the season comes."

"Why hold off until a certain date to rejoice?" I said. "We don't need an excuse to celebrate. Can't we resolve to make our own tradition of, let's say... having the first day of each month a make-your-own holiday? It doesn't have to be a huge deal. And it's only twelve days a year. We could do something special, like order take-out Chinese food -- and eat it by candlelight."

On Christmas, Bob gave me a beautiful glass snow globe. When I gently shake it, snowflakes softly whirl around a dainty evergreen tree. On each limb is a tiny red candle. It's magical to watch the snow swirl as it slowly settles around the tree. And it brings back memories. When I was a little girl I'd watch snow twirl around a ballerina in a globe, making her seem alive as the flakes made their way toward her pink ballet slippers.

I'm not putting Bob's gift away, even though it's a Christmas scene. It's too beautiful to store in the attic. So it will rest on my mantle where I can treasure its beauty. And my favorite ornament, a hand painted oyster shell from Cape Cod, and of course the stocking, will stay downstairs so we can savor more bliss all year long.


I don't want to miss any potential for festivity. Why would I? Where is it written that corned beef is only for St. Patrick's Day or maple-glazed ham for Easter? Plus, must we wait for friends' birthdays to give them presents?

And so, we both made the resolution to celebrate the first day of every month. "If we don't set the date, we may not do it," I said.

And frankly, I think making our own traditions is just as meaningful as conventional rituals. Because they don't come from a calendar. They come from the love in one's heart.

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